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This created friction. Many cisgender gay men and lesbians worried that embracing the "T" made the community look "too weird" to win straight allies. There were infamous instances—such as the 1993 March on Washington, where trans women were told to leave the stage because their presence was "too controversial." In a painful irony, the movement to liberate sexual orientation tried to leave gender identity behind.

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For the first two decades after Stonewall, there was no daylight between "gay" and "trans" in the trenches. The bars that welcomed gay men also sheltered trans women; the bathhouses that served as cruising spots for lesbians were also havens for transmasculine individuals. If your family kicked you out for wearing a dress as a boy, the gayborhood was the only zip code that would have you. Part II: The Great Schism – The 1990s and the Fight for the "T" As the AIDS crisis ravaged the gay community in the 1980s and 1990s, a political shift occurred. The mainstream gay and lesbian movement, desperate for legitimacy in the eyes of the heterosexual world, began pursuing a strategy of assimilation . The goal became "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" repeals, marriage equality, and military service. The pitch was: "We are just like you—normal, monogamous, and cisgender (identifying with the sex assigned at birth)." This created friction